Tips for taking your baby to a wedding

In my time as a parent I have taken a baby (and often a toddler too) to 8 weddings and I have definitely learnt some lessons along the way but the main lesson is that it isn’t as scary as you might think and that you can still have a lovely time so I thought I would compile all my tips into one article for you. 

BEFORE YOU EVEN GET THERE

There can be lots of stress around whether babies or children are invited to the wedding, lots of uncertainty and awkward conversations but the conversations need to be had as far in advance as possible so you know what you’re doing. Often “babes in arms” are welcome but older children aren’t and if they are it’s important that you confirm with them what the set up is so you know everything in advance of getting there - do you need to provide food for them? Is there childcare, do you need to provide it? Are they welcome in the service/speches/meal etc? All important things to clarify.

WHAT TO WEAR

This is only really an issue if you’re breastfeeding, but make sure that you can easily and subtly access the milk because you may have to feed in the middle of the ceremony, or the best man speech and you want to draw as little attention to you as possible so I have worn dresses with buttons down the front, or an stretchy element to the chest area so I can easily pull it down for a feed. You just want to make sure that if you need to settle an unhappy baby quickly, that you can without getting yourself in too much of a fluster. Also, when baby spare clothes for your baby make sure to pack a spare outfit for you. I know it sounds a bit over the top but I was very close to have a poonami all over my dress right as the wedding was starting, and luckily got away with a teeny dot on me in the end but I had no backup plan. Babies can be sick and have nappy explosions in the most inconvenient of times and a wedding is up there at the top I reckon. 

SLEEP

The big panic when thinking about taking a baby to a wedding is of course “Where and when and how will they sleep?” and I think the best thing to do is to take all expectations off the day when it comes to this but there are a few ways that you can help the situation. 

Give them a long nap before you go, even if they don’t normally have a morning nap anymore or perhaps it’s usually a short one, if you can bank a good sleep for them ahead of the wedding, if they are too stimulated to sleep during the ceremony when you get there at least they won’t be overtired and grouchy. Use the carrier during the ceremony and sit near the back at the end of a row so you can make a swift exit if you need to, or stand up swaying or bobbing without getting in anyone’s way. 

After the ceremony is over, everyone will want to say hello to the baby (if they’re awake) so use this time to tire them out but make to leave enough time to sneak off and feed them and put them in the buggy to push to sleep ahead of the meal. This is where my trusty trio comes in - white noise, snoozeshade, rockit. I honestly don’t know what we would have done without them. Make sure they’re well fed, and burped then pop them in the buggy with the white noise on pretty loud in there, cover them over with the snoozeshade so they aren’t distracted by all the fun around them and take them on a little walk. Once asleep get that rockit going and hopefully they sleep long enough for you to enjoy your meal. Now obviously I know all too well that this is in an ideal situation and that’s why you always need the carrier as a backup option so if the buggy isn’t working then take them off somewhere away from the excitement so they drop off and you can sit at the table with them snoozing on you. 

Because weddings are such long days, I usually work on wake windows even if they are on a more regular nap schedule because chances are their naps will be shorter than usual whilst there so just try to keep an eye on the time and make sure you take your baby off somewhere quiet to get them back to sleep when needed (although my youngest would only sleep amongst the noise but make sure they’re facing away so they aren’t looking at it) 

The main thing though - don’t get stressed about the timings and lengths of naps, it’ll consume the day if you do and it’s just not worth it, it’s only one day and won’t ruin any hard work you’ve put into creating a good routine. 

FEEDING

Whether you’re breastfeeding or bottle feeding, be prepared for more feeds than usual. They are likely to be a little more distracted than usual so may not take full feeds when offered, but also they may be awake longer than usual so will need more milk. 

When you arrive at the wedding, either ask someone or do a little exploring to find one or two quiet places that you can go to feed or change nappies throughout the wedding. Never worry about slipping off to do this, no one will mind and you may feel less stressed than trying to do it at the table or during the drinks reception. It's worth finding a kind looking waiter who can heat up milk or get boiled water for you if you need it because they're always more than happy to help with this so never be afraid to ask. 

THE EVENING

Often at weddings you lose track of time, well I do anyway, and by the time you’re sitting down to eat you realise it’s actually your baby’s bedtime!! Don’t panic, timings don’t matter so much today but remember that your baby’s melatonin will be starting to kick in so when the time is right, do what you can to set them up for a big sleep whether that is in the carrier or the buggy (preferably in the buggy if you can so you can have a boogie!) 

At the last wedding we went to, our baby would only sleep right next to the dance floor and if we moved her away she would wake up instantly so sometimes the best sleeping places aren’t the quiet corners that you imagine they would be. If you feel that your baby is getting agitated with the noise then baby ear defenders are really handy to have with you. I have linked some below. 

You don’t need to stay until the end of the wedding, no one would expect you to but if your baby is happy or sleeping then stay!! Like I said, routine is not important on days like this. Yes you may all be tired tomorrow but that’s ok if it means you can have fun and make wonderful memories with your friends and family. 

MUST HAVES

These are the things we have taken to weddings to help us all have a better time. 

1 Baby ear defenders

2. Teething sticks

3.Portable white noise

4. Rockit

5. Snoozeshade - use CHARLIEBARKER for 10% off

Make sure to enjoy yourselves, and remember no one is more aware of the noises your baby is making than you. You've got this :)